April 25, 2025
Pope. Dope. They rhyme. The Dope Pope.
And dope can mean so many things. And pope. Well there is only one; was only one. Will only be one soon! There was Carmelita Pope but I doubt any of you have an inkling of what we lack now.
Still I so squirm at not being kept from the festivities in the Vatican. I would just fit in perfectly, right between two Swiss guards. Like a sandwich. A Roman sandwich, Swiss cheese and me and vaguely Catholic undertones. Lettuce pray.
Oh yes I did.
Somehow I segue to Pope Joan. Mythology theme continues from the previous bit. Whether you take to it or not you have to consider it.
Woman disguises herself as a monk, becomes pope. No one the wiser until she falls off her horse during a papal procession, and gives birth. The crowd stones her.
That’s opera folks!
And continuing with the tall tales, this supposed gave its own birth to the testicle chair. The new pope to be would sit down arranging his vestments just so and some lucky cardinal (did they draw straws?) would snake his hand underneath the seat to the specially place hole in a discovering sort of way. Assuming he encountered resistance, the pope was allowed to pontificate.
And we have the end of Act 1 of Tosca. Te Deum.
I miss Francis. And it’s been a long time since I kneeled in front of a man in flowing robes taking a body part into my mouth. Amen.
Creepy for 10 year olds.”I’m eating what?!”
It’s no wonder the Easter Bunny was so much more interesting.
Enjoy Spring if your in my half or Autumn I’m guessing if your in the other.
-T
P.S. To Carmelita's grandson who contacted me so many years ago - it's a bit late I know but my condolences to you.
April 7, 2025
All I do is drown in tears lately. Or is it bourbon. Or is it gin. I wish it were chartreuse. And goodness know my neighbors wish it were soda with lime.
So many realtors come knocking but none even begin to do their research. I'm not some backwater floozy ... well maybe sort of... but I'm not foolish. I've been around the block and probably yours in fact.
Holy cow, if you're going to try and buy the bride, at least don't insult her. Make an effort bambini! Surprise me with your interest - interest in so many senses of the word. There is interest, and I've had interest but none seem interested enough....
Exhausting. And yet here I be.... still a light in the ever present binary, although a bit dimmer due to unforseen circumstances. Remember Eliza? She ratted me out. I will have satisfaction.
-T
April 16, 2025
Ah sì, I'm trying so hard to be regular and look, I made it already one week. Who knows what tomorrow will bring!
Well it's that time of year for homegrown preparations! I think you all know what I mean. Our vegetables aren't going to bury themselves, we have to help them along. Indeed.
And there's no better way to start making sure nothing untowards ever touches your precious precious but first doing a bit of weeding. Make certain to pull up all those little green shoots before you plant. Even the ones that look like they belong there because.... you ...never ...can ...tell..... can you.
That way you will delight knowing that you have a beautiful garden that you control completely. Everything just like you ordered it.
Maybe even consider a moon garden. Seems appropriate for this neighborhood, right?
Personally I find all the fuss exhausting and would prefer a cocktail and some weed...s. Let and let live and so on. But the neighbors have such funny ideas about leaf blowing and how high your grass will grow, not to mention what I am allowing to poke up from the dirt.
Well allow is such a strong word. Perhaps not allow, but "permissively dismiss bordering on encourage but not quite so proactive". Yet.
-T
P.S. Speaking on hoes, and I was on the previous page if you were paying attention. I think the price of mine just went much higher than was previously mentioned... by someone... other. Tariffs you know. Can't live with 'em'... and so forth.
-T
